Honest Post – Why I’m Sick Of The Gender Debate

First off this isn’t a post meant to cause any offence it is purely just my thoughts on the current gender debate. Obviously I’m all for equality but the current issue regarding children’s gender specific clothing and toys is really starting to piss me off. Quite frankly I think it’s getting out of hand and people are taking offence over everything.

As soon as I found out I was having a girl I went pink crazy, I bought all the cute girly clothes and generally only bought toys if they came in pink. I look forward to the days we can play with barbies and watch all the princess movies together snuggled under pink sparkly blankets. Basically I’m reliving my childhood through my daughter and I love it, bring on the glitter!

gender debate

Having had a boy, who I bought gender specific toys for too, may I add, I was excited at the prospect at getting to indulge in all things girly. Yet now the world is telling me that I shouldn’t be giving my girls ‘girly’ toys to play with or even dress them as girls, and if I do, then I don’t believe in gender equality or my children’s freedom of choice.

Erm, nope

let’s get something straight. I absolutely believe in gender equality and if my boy wants to wear a dress or my girls want play with diggers, so be it. I wouldn’t class myself as a ‘girly girl’ and will happily let my children play with whatever toy they want or dress however they want, I would never stand in their way or tell them something is wrong because of gender. But I will always bring them up as the gender they were born until they can tell me otherwise.

Every time I see a complaint at a piece of clothing or pair of shoes because they are aimed at certain genders or because of their title, I get a little bit more annoyed at how much the gender debate is taking over. At the end of the day you are the one buying said items, if you don’t like the offending item don’t buy it! Don’t complain to get the item removed, what about all of us that don’t give a crap what a pair of shoes are called? If your girl doesn’t like princesses and wearing pink then there are plenty of other options out there these days without having to complain to get items removed from sale, the same goes for boys. If more people bought their kids up to respect others choices, nobody would bat an eyelid at what people wore. Society is a hell of a lot more accepting these days, there’s no need to take things to the extreme. Shops have come a long way in recent years recognising that girls like dinosaurs too etc but there are many little girls that love ballerinas and unicorns, I worry soon these types of clothing won’t exist and we will all be wearing uniforms so as no to offend anyone!

Obviously there are some slogans or assumptions made on gender that cross the line, but again it’s your choice on whether you buy those items. Recently I bought my daughter a t-shirt that says ‘girls are the future’ does that mean that I think boys aren’t? No, I bought the t-shirt because I think it’s cute, plus my girl literally is the future for gods sake, it’s not some subliminal message that boys are worth less than girls.

So this post it to all the parents that want to buy pink sparkly things for their girls or tools and diggers for their boys, and not be judged for it!

Your child your choice (until it becomes theirs obviously) everyone parents differently so let’s stop shoving our opinions down people’s necks please. As long as we are not forcing our own opinions or suppressing their freedom of choice then it’s nobody else’s business how we bring up our own children.

Bore off gender debate, let us parent our way!

 

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Sainsburys Toddler Girls Autumn Clothing Haul (25% Off 15/08/17)

The Sainsburys 25% off clothing sale is back on this week(15/08/17) online and in store,ending Monday I believe. I love Sainsburys toddler girls Autumn clothing and I love getting money off so I was straight there this morning! I managed to pick up some cute bits for Ava ready for Autumn.

Grey jersey cat pinafore dress £9.00 £6.75

Sainsburys Toddler girls autumn clothing

This is so cute and comfy, it will look fab with the cat tights and some boots.

Cat tights 3 pack £6.00 £4.50

Sainsbury's tu clothing

Ava is going to love wearing these, they will go with so many of her Autumn dresses.

Cream flower dress and tights set  £11.00 £8.25

Sainsburys Toddler girls autumn clothing

 

Everyone needs a jumper dress for Autumn/Winter right?

Cream fur hooded gilet £10.00 £7.50

I bought one of these last year, they are really warm and cosy, perfect for Autumn days.

Beige tartan skirt £9 £ 6.75

Sainsburys Toddler girls autumn clothing

This will looking amazing with a nice jumper and some brown boots.

Unicorn and mermaids socks 5 pack £2.50 £1.87

These are actually marked up at £5 but scanned as £2.50, bargain! Ava loves unicorns,mermaids,cats and dogs so I’m onto a winner with these.

Ballet shoes £5.00 £3.75

Ava does ballet classes so I picked her some more shoes up in the next size, would be rude not to at that price.

I love autumn fashion for girls, I’ve had my eye on a few things which you can see here. Ava is going to be one hell of a well dressed toddler in autumn, I can’t wait!

Amy x

 

 

 

 

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Lazy Sundays – The ordinary moments

Lazy Sundays do not occur very often in our house. I like to spend Sundays visiting places and I often feel like spending a family day indoors is a waste of a day. However jobs around the house could not be put off any longer, we were staying in. I decided to make the most of our lazy day with a film and homemade cakes (after I had stopped being a grump about staying in)

Lazy Sundays, sofa snuggles and a movie

Is there a better way to spend a day indoors than under a blanket watching a Disney film? Not in my eyes there isn’t. We chose to watch Moana as non of us had seen it yet. Ava isn’t one for sitting still watching films but I was pleasantly surprised, we probably got a good half and hour out of her which is better than the usual 30 seconds. Ava loves having Jack around, not sure Jack loves being forced to play with in the night garden toys though!

Lazy Sundays

 Lazy Sunday

 Ava’s first cakes

In my head the idea of spending Sundays baking with my children is dreamy. In reality the thought sends shivers down my spine. I can be a massive control freak when it comes to letting the kids make something on their own, the thought of them not doing something right or making a mess gets me all twitchy and when baking with Jack in the past I have often taken over and not let him do anything. It’s awful I know and I don’t want to be like that. Some of my fondest childhood memories are of baking cakes and biscuits and I want my children to have the same memories.

 

 Lazy Sundays

 

 Not today Satan, I’m baking with my daughter

I bit the bullet and decided we would make Peppa Pig cakes. The mix had been sitting in the cupboard for ages. I let Ava lay out the cake cases and we all took turns to whisk the cake mixture. It went surprisingly well and Ava only stuck cake batter in my hair once or twice! The cakes turned out pretty good, thankfully we had enough chocolate icing left to decorate them after Ava decided it needed sampling…multiple times.

Lazy Sundays

I’m never going to be the kind of girl who enjoys staying in but I reckon we can factor in a few lazy Sundays, especially if there are cakes involved.

How do you spend your lazy Sundays?

Amy x

 

The Ordinary Moments
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Baby Update – Ava Is 18 Months Old

I can not believe I am the owner of one sassy independent 18 month old. I’m not sure I’m ready for her to be a proper toddler. I swear she gets more grown up and learns a new skill by the second. I have not done a baby update for ages, mainly because I don’t want anyone fretting that Ava is doing something that their child is not. As parents we worry far too much and put a lot of pressure on ourselves and our children if they aren’t doing what ‘Susan’s’ little angel is. However I feel like 18 months is a significant milestone and I want to remember Ava’s quirky little ways and questionable attempts at talking.

18 months of Ava

Ava is an absolute sponge at the minute, show her something once and she instantly copies it. That’s not always great though, she now wonders around trying to turn off plugs with her foot because she saw me do it, oops.

Talking, walking and lack of teeth

Her talking has really come on in the last couple of weeks, going from saying a few words to attempting mini sentences, I say attempting because anyone who doesn’t speak toddler wouldn’t have a bloody clue what she was on about. I know ultimately toddlers will start to communicate at their own speed but there is a couple of things I have been doing to encourage her which you can read in this post

She no longer tentatively toddles about the place, now she runs around at top speed with the grace of a bulldozer.

We are still eagerly awaiting more teeth, she has her 4 at the top and 4 at the bottom plus half of a molar at the top. I have a horrible feeling they will all come through at once!

 

Likes and dislikes

Her personality is really coming through now and she is honestly the funniest little girl ever, she is such a clown and she is always trying to make us laugh. She just loves being silly.

She is a bit of free spirit and loves nothing more than being able to do what she wants, annoying as hell for us at times and the cause of many a tantrum, from both me and her. As much as we clash over this trait its something I love about her and want to continue guiding her into becoming a confident strong-minded little lady.

There is a special place in her heart for In the night garden at the minute, particularly Macca Pacca who she calls Bacca, repeatedly, all day. She loves playing with her toys and you can see her imagination has really begun to develop.

Hair washing is her least favourite activity, met with cries of “noooo” and screams that sound like we are murdering her. God knows what the neighbours think we are doing to her every night.

Baby update

The next baby update

I cant wait to see what the next 6 months has in store her, I know she will continue to make us laugh each and every day. The next baby update will be an extra special one as Ava will be a big sister!

Amy x

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National Breastfeeding Week – My Story – Why I Stopped Breastfeeding And Why I’m Totally OK With It

As it is National Breastfeeding week I thought I would share my breastfeeding journey. Breastfeeding is not something I particularly enjoyed, I didn’t feel any kind of special connection and I’m not brave enough to get my boobs out in public. I take my hat off to those who can get past the painful phase and those with the confidence to feed in public. That just isn’t me and I’m OK with that, I don’t feel sad or guilty that it didn’t work out for us and neither should you!

My breastfeeding story with Jack

I gave birth at 16 and even though I was so young I felt pressured by health professionals to breastfeed, not really knowing anything else I thought I had no choice but to do it, no one talked of formula or bottle feeding. I fed Jack for roughly 2 weeks before I decided I did not want to do it anymore. It hurt, I wasn’t enjoying it and as a 16-year-old I certainly wasn’t going to feed in public. I switched to formula and instantly felt like a weight had been lifted.

My breastfeeding story with Ava

Even though I knew I didn’t like breastfeeding I still wanted to attempt it with Ava and see how we got on. I was quite firm with the health professionals that I would give it a go and then move onto formula if it wasn’t for us, thankfully this time they respected that decision and didn’t try to force it on me. I fed Ava exclusively for 2 and a half days before I realised it wasn’t working for us. She was a very fidgety eater and wasn’t latching properly which in turn was making me sore and she wasn’t getting as much feed as she required. I had bought a starter pack of ready-made formula so I gave her a bottle of that and instantly she seemed more settled. I did attempt to express for a couple of days before deciding to move to bottle feeding.

 

How will I feed the new baby

As with Ava and Jack I will feed them myself for the first couple of days so as they get the ‘good stuff’ after that I shall just see how it goes and move to formula if things are not working out.

Please don’t leave any negative comments I know how beneficial breastfeeding is and but unfortunately I just don’t feel like it is for me and to carry on when I wasn’t enjoying it would seriously affect my mental health, and at the end of the day happy mum = happy baby.

To anyone who feels the same as me please don’t beat yourself up or allow anyone to make you feel guilty, it’s your body, your baby, your decision. Breastfeeding will not be right for everyone and that is absolutely O.K!

Amy x

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