Chuck it in the fuck it bucket and move on
Today has been one of those mum fail days where everything has gone disastrously wrong, the kind of day where you sit crying about your failings at life but ultimately know you will fondly recall this day in the future and laugh…. maybe…that’s what I’m clinging to right now.
A family Sunday
The day started off fine, I had energy for once, a rare occurrence for a pregnant toddler mum. I had an urge to get outside and do some exploring with my little family (plus I could really do with some good pics for Insta, shhh don’t tell them that)
Where it all went wrong
We decided on a farm we had never visited before, I had a voucher for it so we thought why not. Upon driving over there I discovered the voucher isn’t valid on special days and today was a special day – Strike one.
When we got there we were greeted by what can only be described as a sea of mud and what looked like the most untoddler friendly farm I have ever seen. We turned around and made a sharp exit and decided to head back home, not before calling in our local Tesco. Basically we drove 20 mile to go to Tesco, that’s less than 2 mile away. Fucking great, I wasted a full face of expensive makeup for bloody Tesco, and I didn’t even get out of the car. By this point Ava had been possessed by a demon because it was nearly nap time. Back home we went.
Fast forward to Miss Ava being awake, she was put back in the car to visit Nanny and Grandad – who weren’t in!
Poor kid, I’ll build her a den out of sofa cushions to play in I thought, that will be fun. Except I seem to of missed the parenting class that taught valuable den building skills. My attempt lasted all of 20 seconds before it caved in on Ava, now she’s traumatised and I’m questioning if I should even be allowed to parent. And I don’t even want to talk about how disgusting the sofa was under those cushions…perfect housewife I am not.
Just when I thought the day couldn’t get worse, the teenager decides to tell me the biggest piece of bullshit over why his phone doesn’t work. Apparently the new update did it, except I can see water sloshing around in it! How stupid does this kid think I am?
Pity party for one
So now I’m sat here being completely irrational, crying about how hard done to I am, how stressed I am and how tired I am (that burst of energy is long gone) At least I have cake, pity parties are always better with cake.
Here’s to a better week!! It can’t get any worse, can it?
Goal for next week? Pinterest the shit out of how to parent.