Mothers Day Without A Mother

As Mother’s Day approaches each year, the sadness,the bitterness,the loneliness  I feel really kicks up a notch and I can’t help but feel resentful every time I see mothers and daughters out together for the day, I’m sad that those days were taken away from me.

This may sound like I’ve lost my mom and I have, my Mom is not dead though, she just chose not to be in my life, my 16th birthday was the last time I spoke to her, the day my life changed forever and she kicked me out on the streets and told me she didn’t want to see me again, at the time I was glad, scared of what my future would hold but I was happy to be free from her. For years me and my dad suffered both mental and physical abuse from her, she is a truly horrible person and I will never understand why she treated us so badly. She has seen us in passing and doesn’t even give us a second glance, not a care in the world for her daughter or grandchildren.

It doesn’t really bother me that she’s not in our lives, but I can’t help feeling like I’ve been robbed of something special. That mother/daughter bond that I see so many of you have. My mother was not there to help choose my wedding dress, watch me get married or be there when I gave birth, I don’t get to organise spa days or afternoon teas, book girly shopping trips, pick out the perfect gift for Mother’s Day or simply just ring her for advice. I do buy things for my lovely mother-in-law  but it’s just not the same, she’s not my mother, she’s someone else’s.

I would never treat my children the way I was treated, I just don’t know how anyone could. They will always know how much I love them and I look forward to the mothers days when they can take me out and I can finally have that mother/daughter bond with my daughter that I never had chance to have.

I’m sorry if this is a tough read for anyone, the real story is a hell of a lot worse and I’m not sure I will ever be able to share it but I just wanted to get a bit off my chest and explain why my mother is never spoke about.





Thanks for reading

Love Amy xx


My Top 5 Baby Books

I am a real bookworm and love reading, something I hope to pass down to my children, so it’s important to me to instill a love of reading early on. Ava has loads of book, more than any baby will ever need and yet I keep buying her more, ooops I can’t help myself, there’s just so many good ones. I thought I would compile a little list of our favourite ones for anyone wondering where to start.

That’s not my…..

These books are just amazing, especially for younger ones that are just discovering textures. There are so many to choose from and you can incorporate them into seasonal play too, for spring we have That’s not my duck,piglet,cow and lamb. They can be pricey but often, on Amazon or in Sainsbury’s they are half price.

Rabbit’s Nap



There are a few in this range but this is our favourite, I like to read it to her before I put her down for a nap. She also loves lifting the flaps and will happily sit there ‘reading’ it herself.

Guess how much I love you


This is just a beautiful book, a true classic! It’s took me a long time to not cry at the ending and even now it’s still chokes me. I like to read this to her before bed, and I just know it will be a favourite for years to come.

We’re going on a bear hunt


This has been a firm favourite of mine ever since Jack was little and I used to read it to him. Ava loves to find the doggy on each page and always waves bye bye to the bear, sooo cute!

Dear Zoo


If Ava could talk she would tell you that by far, this is her favourtist book. The flaps are big enough for her to open herself so she loves discovering the animals, we have also taught her to shout roar when she opens to lion!

Ava has a little reading area set up in her room where she will sit just before bed to read some stories.

I buy the majority of her books from Sainsbury’s as they are always so cheap, don’t forget to check out your local library too.

Thanks for reading

Love Amy xx


We survived the first year of parenthood

So we did it, we survived the first year of having a new baby, and neither us have been carted off to the nutty farm, although Andy does tell me I need sending there at least once a week, cheeky sod.

The first year of Ava’s life has been a whirlwind, no seriously, when people say it goes so fast they are not exaggerating, it’s literally sped by and those newborn days are nothing but a distant foggy memory. There have been good days, bad days and some down right awful days and lots of tears, mainly mine.

My advice to anyone about to embark of the first year? erm good f*cking luck you are in for one hell of a bumpy ride, but the days of endless feeding soon pass, the nappy changes get fewer, and those sleepless nights get better, although I’m not sure you will every truly have your shit together, as one phase passes another one comes and bulldozes you back on your arse again, but as with all the other phases, you learn, you adapt and you just deal with it. It definitely gets easier and much more enjoyable so hang on in there, the days may be long but the years are short so make the most of them.

We are now embarking on the next stage, toddlerhood. Toddlerhood with a very strong-willed little lady, send help or wine! Already there have been tantrums, tears and bloodshed (again,mainly from me) Ava likes to do what she wants, when she wants, usually that involves trying to climb and dive off things head first. We are only one month in so far and everything has changed, nap times, meal times, attitude, are all different from before and as much as she drives me up the wall, she never fails to make me laugh everyday or amaze us at each new skill she learns, it’s crazy how much they suddenly start doing isn’t it?

The past year as a family of four has undoubtedly been challenging but it’s been the best year ever and I can’t wait to see what this year holds.

Thanks for reading

Love Amy x



Panda Kids Luxury Memory Foam Bamboo Pillow // Review

As Ava was approaching One I started looking for a little pillow for her cot. Ava was sleeping in a baby sleeping bag with no pillow, however I was keen to slowly introduce some more grown up elements into her cot such as a pillow/duvet so as she gets used to them before the time comes to change her cot to a toddler bed.


I came across Panda pillows on twitter and they kindly sent me one to review. Ava has been using it ever since, shes a bit of a fidget bum and she definitely doesn’t spend the whole night on the pillow but she does start off up there and if she wakes in the night she will go and put her head back on it to go to sleep again.

The pillow itself is made from environmentally friendly odourless memory foam, which helps to correctly align the neck and shoulder area allowing for a comfortable nights sleep. The curved shape of the pillow is also proven to to help fight against flat head syndrome.

The pillow is encased in a super soft bamboo fibre cover which is easily removed for washing although, bamboo doesn’t need washing as frequently and it dries in half the time of cotton. It is naturally hypoallergenic and antibacterial, making it perfect for little ones with sensitive skin. Bamboo fibre has natural temperature regulating properties too meaning your little one is kept cool in summer and warm in winter.

Also the case has a cute little panda face on which Ava loves. Overall we really love this pillow and Ava will definitely continue using it. My older son has also requested we get him one as he thinks it’s very comfy too!

You can purchase a pillow Here – Panda Kids Luxury Memory Foam Pillow

Thanks for reading

Amy x


Mothers Day Gift Guide 2017

As Mothers Day is approaching, rather quickly may I add sneaky little devil, I thought id put together a little gift guide with a few various items for those struggling for ideas (hint hint husband)



mothers day.jpg

Lush ‘yummy mummy’ Shower Gel 100g £4.95|

Selfish Mother ‘Mother’ Supersoft Sweatshirt £50|

Stanley And Maud Bee Initial Necklace £38.00|

Freddies Flowers For your first bunch free, use code AmyM5229|

Emma Bridgewater Mug £19.99|

The White Company Seychelles Candle £20.00|

LilyBelleDesigns Personalised Stretch Bracelet £22.00|

The Unmumsy Mum Diary £6.49

Lush Mum BathBomb £2.95


I hope you all have a wonderful Mothers Day filled with laughter and loved ones

Love Amy xx