Its ok not to be ok

A note to everyone that feels like they are losing their shit..

So bit of a personal post here but I think sometimes we all need to know that other people are feeling the same. Ava has been a bit of a nightmare just recently, teething plus a good dose of separation anxiety does not make for a happy baby and I’m not afraid to admit its/still is bloody hard. There have been days when I’ve cried along with her and days when I’ve felt a bit angry towards her, major mom guilt on that one but when you have listened to them cry and whinge all day and nothing you do makes them happy you can’t help get a bit frustrated and text your husband to say you are throwing the baby out (ahem, I wouldn’t actually throw her out) That’s not as bad as when she was about 6 weeks old and I text to say I hated her! I didn’t mean it but I was sooo sleep deprived at the time I don’t think I liked anyone!

Since having ava there has been numerous days when I’ve wanted to run away, a crying baby and lack of sleep does nothing for your mental well-being. You can really beat yourself up for feeling rubbish but we are all entitled to our ‘off’ days, apparently babies like to have plenty of ‘off’ days, usually just as you start to think you’ve got this parenting malarkey sorted BOOM say hello to psycho baby again!

Parenting is hard, there’s no sugar-coating it so don’t buy into that bullshit that it will be amazing all the time because quite frankly it’s not, in amongst all the fun and lovely days there will be days when you question your own sanity for having this demon child! but hang on in there, tomorrow is a new day and if you are really struggling make sure you talk to someone, social media is great for this, through Instagram I’ve found lots of parents I can turn to for advice or just generally have a whinge about how my child is being a bit of a dick.

We are all just winging it and losing our shit every now and again, just remember, your little darling wont remember about the time you didn’t play with them every second of the day or if you didn’t leave the house or get dressed (why isn’t it socially acceptable to wear your pjs out of the house yet??) Its ok not to have your shit together every day, if at all, it just means you are human and as I keep telling myself, it will get easier, you may want to punch anyone in the face that tells you that right now but I promise it does!

Top tips for when it all gets a bit much

  • Take a minute – if you baby is making you want to tear your hair out, put them in a safe place and just take a minute for yourself to calm down/have a little cry/go to the toilet in peace.
  • Always try to make time for yourself – I have a bath and catch up on vlogs I watch on YouTube  when ava has gone to bed at night then me and my husband watch TV together (read – sit on our phones whilst the TV is on haha must work on that!)
  • Talk to someone- have a good old rant if you need to!

And…

  • If all else fails get yourself a nice drink,a takeaway and eat your feelings – not a good tip and probably the reason I go to slimming world! but some nice food certainly improves my mood.

 

 Love Amy xx

1 Comment

  1. Luna
    December 4, 2018 / 1:18 pm

    Amazing that I just found this after reading your post about the trip to the Garden Centre and just how grown up Ava looks now. Must be so good to look back on posts like this and remember how much better things get from those dark days. Life is never perfect, it can be a constant battle sometimes and your own mental strength is tested often as children grow. Just have to remember that the good times do come & if you work together & make the most of what little quality time you get as a couple you can (and will) overcome anything and I wish you both & your family all the best.

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